Why do I do this? I make a comment on a thread on social media, then end up being made to feel like shit by the people who reply after me.
I feel like my reply is brushed off and patronised. I know that this isn’t the case, and I’m over-reacting, but it hurts so much. I’ve no ability to shrug it off.
All my life, I’ve been belittled and mocked. From as far back as I can remember, my ‘father’ would call me stupid and mock me.
Then when I moved to England, my accent was mocked in school when I put up my hand to answer a question. Pretty soon I just stopped talking.
My ex belittled and mocked me every time I spoke at home. My work as a nurse was the only place I was free to talk with no fear of being mocked. People respected my knowledge and also me. But I don’t have that now.
I don’t have anything now. I just have my cloud of shame. Let me hide in its darkness and just wither away.